Saturday, February 6, 2010

February resolutions

1. No more angsty blog posts. (probably) ALmost absolutely. Okay, okay. That's the point of resolutions....they are hard. I can do it! I woke up with the realization that I was venting angst all over my collaborators (all five of them) in addition to my family and friends. I posted to the wrong blog. I deleted that post. I also realize that I should feel just as bad about getting angsty to friends and family as collaborators. (except that y'all are nice to me)

2. Beyond that though. I think I am through with angst (for now). My tantrum broke two nights ago. I realized at 3:00 AM what all the fuss was about. My brain was protesting injury and trauma. It's been through a lot and I guess I needed one final reminder about how bad it has been so that I wouldn't forget and take my brain for granted. I finally got the point and giggled as I thought..."Okay, okay, no more trauma. I promise." Tantrum was done. (It wasn't even the dermatologists fault really but I still don't feel very bad about insulting him. He had it coming!) Reading is better. Frustration is at normal levels. My brain is a happy place. I think it's done getting better. Really this time. If there are other things that have to get better, I think my brain can handle them quietly now.

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